{"id":2756,"date":"2026-08-05T14:11:19","date_gmt":"2026-08-05T11:11:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/?p=2756"},"modified":"2026-08-05T14:11:21","modified_gmt":"2026-08-05T11:11:21","slug":"konfeti-patlatmak-sart-degil-ama","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/05\/konfeti-patlatmak-sart-degil-ama\/","title":{"rendered":"Konfeti patlatmak \u015fart de\u011fil (ama\u2026)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Beni uzun s\u00fcredir takip ediyorsan\u0131z burada ara s\u0131ra ki\u015fisel tarihime not d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm blog yaz\u0131lar\u0131 yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 biliyorsunuz. Mesela bi unvan<\/a> var. Tarihi 20 Ocak 2021. Poznan’day\u0131m. T\u00fcrkiye’de herhangi bir kurumla ba\u011flant\u0131m kalmam\u0131\u015f. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc ba\u015f\u0131ndan beri 2 y\u0131ll\u0131k oldu\u011fu belli olan projemin ikinci y\u0131l\u0131nda g\u00f6revlendirme sorunlar\u0131 olmu\u015f. \u0130stifa ettirilmi\u015fim. \u0130stifa gerek\u00e7emde “\u00f6zel nedenlerden dolay\u0131” yaz\u0131lm\u0131\u015f. “Tek bir kadromuz bile \u00e7ok \u00f6nemli, hi\u00e7biri g\u00f6zden \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131lamaz”\u0131n birimin mottosu haline geldi\u011fi y\u0131l en kolay g\u00f6zden \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131lan benim kadrom olmu\u015f. Sonra p\u00fcf diye yok olmu\u015fum ortadan. Hi\u00e7 var olmam\u0131\u015f\u0131m gibi. Kendisi i\u00e7in ba\u015fvuru yapmaya \u00fc\u015fenen can\u0131m dostum o zaman o\u011flunun boyuna denk dosyalarla s\u0131rf benim varl\u0131\u011f\u0131m i\u00e7in bo\u011fu\u015fmasa yaz\u0131lamayacak bir blog yaz\u0131s\u0131yd\u0131 o 2021’deki. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sonra mesela 2023 Ocak’ta yazm\u0131\u015f\u0131m Unvan, kadro, s\u0131navlar, kutlamalar vesaire\u2026<\/a> yaz\u0131s\u0131n\u0131. 2021 Kas\u0131m T\u00fcrkiye’ye d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm. D\u00f6nmeden az evvel T\u00fcrkiye’de i\u015fsiz oldu\u011fum i\u00e7\u00fcn bir ERC StG yazm\u0131\u015f\u0131m ODT\u00dc ev sahipli\u011finde. Olmam\u0131\u015f. Sonra uzun s\u00fcre nerelere gitsem diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm. Kimse ya bizim bi Zehra vard\u0131 ne oldu ona dememi\u015f o d\u00f6nem. \u00d6l\u00fc taklidi yapal\u0131m, belki buray\u0131 hi\u00e7 hat\u0131rlamaz demi\u015fler aksine. Birka\u00e7 yerle g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm. Hi\u00e7biri i\u00e7ime sinmemi\u015f. Yine can\u0131m dostum \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f ortaya. \u00d6zl\u00fck haklar\u0131ndan bahsetmi\u015f, kazan\u0131lm\u0131\u015f haktan. Yasal haktan. Yapacaklar\u0131m\u0131zdan. Yapmay\u0131 planlad\u0131klar\u0131m\u0131zdan… Ay kadrolarda s\u0131k\u0131\u015fma olacak, fiziksel kapasitemiz s\u0131n\u0131rl\u0131, t\u00fch t\u00fch ne yapsaklara ra\u011fmen d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm. D\u00f6nd\u00fckten hemen sonra kadroya atan\u0131nca anlam\u0131\u015f\u0131m s\u0131k\u0131\u015fman\u0131n s\u00f6z konusu bile olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131. H\u0131zl\u0131ca atanm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Ve o blogun sonuna \u015f\u00f6yle yazm\u0131\u015f\u0131m: “Tavsiye vermekten pek haz etmem ama kendi t\u0131rnaklar\u0131n\u0131zla, hak ederek, s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131zda kimsenin eli olmadan elde etti\u011finiz her \u015feyi \u00e7ok g\u00fcr\u00fclt\u00fcl\u00fc kutlay\u0131n. Konfeti patlatmak \u015fart de\u011fil.” <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ard\u0131ndan “Kendi de\u011ferini bilmek\/belirlemek \u00fczerine”<\/a> gelmi\u015f. Ara\u015ft\u0131rma grubumu kurma vizyonuyla hareket ederken, alan\u0131n s\u0131\u011f i\u00e7 sava\u015flar\u0131yla kar\u015f\u0131la\u015fm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. \u00c7ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m her kap\u0131da bilimsel vizyonum de\u011fil, “sava\u015f\u0131n hangi taraf\u0131nda oldu\u011fum” sorulmu\u015f. Tarafs\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n ve sadece ara\u015ft\u0131rmaya odaklanman\u0131n su\u00e7 say\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir iklimde Ezgi ile yollar\u0131m\u0131z kesi\u015fmi\u015f. Sistemik ezberleri de\u011fi\u015ftirmek i\u00e7in \u00e7abalamaya o g\u00fcn karar vermi\u015fiz. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sonra bak en g\u00fczellerinden biri bu. Alan\u0131mda ilk kez biri BAGEP alm\u0131\u015f. BEN. \u0130nsan fevkalade memnun olmaz m\u0131 d\u00fcnyaya geldi\u011fine diyerek bunu yazm\u0131\u015f\u0131m: Fevkalade memnunum d\u00fcnyaya geldi\u011fime<\/a>\u2026 D\u00fcnyan\u0131n en mutlu insan\u0131 olmu\u015fum. Ne kutlamalar yapm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ondan bir hafta sonra Kurumsal ol(a)mayan kurumsal ileti\u015fim ve sistematik g\u00f6rmezden gelmeler \u00fczerine<\/a> diye bir \u015fey yazm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Kendi b\u00fcnyesinden \u00e7\u0131kan bu ba\u015far\u0131y\u0131 t\u00fcm d\u00fcnya kutlarken, g\u00f6rmezden gelmeyi tercih eden s\u0131\u011f anlay\u0131\u015fa kar\u015f\u0131 b\u0131y\u0131k alt\u0131ndan g\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sonra bak bu en efsanesi: Ki\u015fisel tarihe bir ba\u015fka not: OpenRAM<\/a>. Zehra Ta\u015fk\u0131n 1,7 Milyon Euro’luk proje alm\u0131\u015f. \u00d6ncesini sonras\u0131n\u0131 kimse merak etmemi\u015f. Ancak baz\u0131 masalarda ara\u015ft\u0131rman\u0131n kendisinden \u00e7ok de\u011fi\u015fimle geleceklerin nereye s\u0131\u011faca\u011f\u0131 konu\u015fulmu\u015f. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnsene, 1,7 milyon avroluk projenin ilk g\u00fcndemi metrekare hesab\u0131. Ben de haliyle biraz gerilmi\u015fim. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sonra ba\u015fka COST ba\u015fvurular\u0131, ikili anla\u015fmalar, yeni ba\u015fvurular ve ba\u015fvuru fikirleri olmu\u015f. 5 sene \u00f6nce denedi\u011fim ERC’yi bu kez almak i\u00e7in t\u00fcm \u015fartlar olgunla\u015fm\u0131\u015f. Avrupa Komisyonu StG y\u0131l limitlerini de\u011fi\u015ftirmi\u015f. Ezgi iki kez ERC’nin ucundan d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f, d\u00f6nd\u00fck\u00e7e bir sonraki ba\u015fvuru d\u00f6neminde proje-badi olma gaz\u0131 vermi\u015f. Ben de ilk kez “Acaba ger\u00e7ekten olur mu?” diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeye ba\u015flam\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Tek meseleyse o fikri hayata ge\u00e7irecek zemini kurmakm\u0131\u015f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sonra ilgin\u00e7 bir \u015fey olmu\u015f. \u00dcniversite \u00fcst y\u00f6netimi demi\u015f ki, “Hem o b\u00fcy\u00fck projeni en iyi \u015fekilde y\u00fcr\u00fctmek hem de hayalindeki di\u011fer b\u00fcy\u00fck ara\u015ft\u0131rmalar\u0131 hayata ge\u00e7irmek i\u00e7in neye ihtiyac\u0131n var?” Demi\u015fim ki: fiziksel imk\u00e2n. \u00c7\u00f6z\u00fcm de bekledi\u011fimden h\u0131zl\u0131 gelmi\u015f. Bili\u015fim Enstit\u00fcs\u00fc b\u00fcnyesinde g\u00f6revlendirilmi\u015fim. Me\u011fer akl\u0131mdaki fikirler i\u00e7in en uygun yer de oras\u0131ym\u0131\u015f. Oturmu\u015fum, keyifle plan yapmaya ba\u015flam\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Zaten d\u00fcnyan\u0131n pek \u00e7ok yerinde de i\u015fler b\u00f6yle y\u00fcr\u00fcyormu\u015f. B\u00fcy\u00fck ara\u015ft\u0131rma fikirleri olan insanlara o fikirleri hayata ge\u00e7irebilecekleri ortam sa\u011flan\u0131yormu\u015f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O s\u0131rada i\u00e7eride bamba\u015fka g\u00fcndemler varm\u0131\u015f. G\u00f6revlendirmenin nas\u0131l ve neden ger\u00e7ekle\u015fti\u011fini merak eden pek olmam\u0131\u015f. Herkes elindeki par\u00e7alarla kendi hik\u00e2yesini kurmu\u015f. Ben de ilk kez o hik\u00e2yelerin hi\u00e7birine dahil olmamay\u0131 se\u00e7mi\u015fim. Enerjimi anlatmaya de\u011fil, \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmaya ay\u0131rm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. D\u00f6n\u00fcp bak\u0131nca en do\u011fru karar da oymu\u015f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gelgelelim b\u00fct\u00fcn bu yaz\u0131n\u0131n as\u0131l sebebine. G\u00fcn\u00fcn birinde \u00fcniversite \u00f6n\u00fcme iki se\u00e7enek koymu\u015f. “Hangisini istersin?” demi\u015f. Ben de birini se\u00e7mi\u015fim. Sonras\u0131 ise beni bug\u00fcn bu sat\u0131rlar\u0131 yazmaya getirmi\u015f.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Art\u0131k Bilgi Ara\u015ft\u0131rmalar\u0131 Anabilim Dal\u0131nda profes\u00f6r\u00fcm. B\u00fcy\u00fck hayallerim var. Hepsini hayata ge\u00e7irecek enerjim de. Benim i\u00e7in bu hik\u00e2yenin en heyecan verici k\u0131sm\u0131 ise Bili\u015fim Enstit\u00fcs\u00fc. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Haberi aileme verdi\u011fimde her zamanki refleksimle meseleyi k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcltmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. “T\u00fcrkiye’de akademide yeterince kalan herkesi profes\u00f6r yap\u0131yorlar babaj\u0131m, bu kadar abartmaya gerek yok.” Babam y\u00fcz\u00fcme ters ters bak\u0131p \u015f\u00f6yle demi\u015f: “Kendinle ilgili her \u015feyi de\u011fersizle\u015ftirme huyuna t\u00fck\u00fcreyim.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Adam hakl\u0131 beyler.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc d\u00f6n\u00fcp bak\u0131nca g\u00f6r\u00fcyorum ki bu hik\u00e2yede bana en \u00e7ok e\u015flik eden \u015fey belirsizlik olmu\u015f. Sonra inad\u0131m. Sonra yol arkada\u015flar\u0131m. Sonra hayallerim. Her seferinde bir sonraki ad\u0131m\u0131 atm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Bazen d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcne, bazen ko\u015fa ko\u015fa. (bu arada yalan yok, genelde hareket etmek i\u00e7in \u00e7ok d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmem :=))<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bug\u00fcn d\u00f6n\u00fcp eski blog yaz\u0131lar\u0131ma bak\u0131nca asl\u0131nda birbirinden ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131z notlar g\u00f6rm\u00fcyorum. Ayn\u0131 hik\u00e2yenin farkl\u0131 zamanlarda tutulmu\u015f kay\u0131tlar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcyorum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Galiba bu y\u00fczden bu kez kutlayaca\u011f\u0131m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Konfeti patlatmam \u015fart de\u011fil. Ama bu hik\u00e2yeyi k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcltmeye de hi\u00e7 niyetim yok. XOXO.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Beni uzun s\u00fcredir takip ediyorsan\u0131z burada ara s\u0131ra ki\u015fisel tarihime not d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm blog yaz\u0131lar\u0131 yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 biliyorsunuz. Mesela bi unvan var. Tarihi 20 Ocak 2021. Poznan’day\u0131m.…<\/p>\n

Devam\u0131n\u0131 okuyunKonfeti patlatmak \u015fart de\u011fil (ama\u2026)<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2756","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-genel","entry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2756","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2756"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2756\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2763,"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2756\/revisions\/2763"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2756"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2756"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zehrataskin.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2756"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}